The Swirl Effect :)

I try to name these blogs something that's subtle in cases of more controversial topics. This one is something that will hit home to lots of people, because we're amongst a group of individuals in where even though progress has been made, there's still a lot more to go.

What exactly am I talking about when I say the Swirl Effect? Well, that's my way of saying interracial relationships. Think of it in terms of ice cream...Vanilla and Chocolate swirled together to make one delicious cold treat. Top it off with some sprinkles and you've got a field day of yumminess. We could also call it the Neopolitan, but now we're just getting technical. The point is, that today, more and more people are exploring relationships with people outside their ethnicities. And while many people are completely accepting of it, there are a lot of traditional people in the world that still have a hard time accepting this type of relationship. So let's discuss.

I'm gonna put myself out there as an example to this one. My family heritage is Puerto Rican. Culturally, they are a very prideful and family oriented group of people. They are traditional, and believe in traditional values. Often times, a woman such as myself is expected to find herself a nice Puerto Rican or Latin boy, but even then, some latin ethnicities are less preferred. We're also expected to do it by a certain age. The younger we are when we marry, the more time we have to develop a family, because again that's just the expectation, large families, young love, compatibility.

But in my generation, women have come far enough to where we want to start a career. We go through college right out of high school rather than getting married. We put off relationships so that we can find great jobs, great careers. I'm already at what we have now dubbed the "quarter life" and I've yet to get started on the career path that I want. With the economy the way it is in 2012, who can afford to have a full family unless we have a full time, great paying job? And those are hard to come by. So yes, relationships in my life have taken a backburner.

Back on topic. Here's where I'm also not culturally traditional. I have a preference, and it is not one of my own ethnicity. I have to say I prefer to date caucasion men. It's just what I'm attracted to, and there are times where the women in my family do question or ask about my choices. All I can say is, that's who and what I like, and that's what I go for. I'm happy with it, and as long as I find someone that makes me happy, then why should it matter what they look like?

The matriarchs in our families grew up in a time when racism was still an issue. If you have an older mother, or grandmother, schools were still segregated, stereotypes were prevalent and quite honestly, they still are in some cases. When you see an interracial couple walking down the road, do you say "aw they look happy together" or is your first thought "oh, why are they together?" If your first thought is HONESTLY the second, then I'm not saying you're racist, because that's not the case, I'm just saying that we're still stuck in a mindset where something like that can still come as a surprise. And that is the effect that our cultures still have on us.

We have to remember that love knows no boundaries. There's no such thing as color when it comes to love. To be able to have that connection with someone, regardless of what they look like is what makes the relationship so powerful. To be able to share with someone your dreams...your DREAMS...not your career goals, is something so amazing. Your photos with your loved one will have a sparkle in it that makes it beautiful because the way you feel about each other radiates off to the camera more than a "pretty couple" photo. But maybe one day, we'll be able to look at such a couple and say "Aw they look happy together, they're beautiful".